At some point in Germany, I began coloring my hair (as I can see in my son's graduation and family photos in 2007). I then stopped for a fairly long period again. In fact, it has only been since I about a year after I moved to Denver that I seriously began coloring my hair again. Yet here I am, seriously considering letting that color go-permanently this time.
I have friends (and probably readers), who come from the "Dye till I die" school of thought, and I appreciate that. But that is never where I was, or planned to be. And I have never been one of those people who was determined to "look younger than I am" or "hide my age". I'm more interested in looking the best I can, you know? And for me that mainly means being healthy and taking care of my self.
Now I need to be honest here as I consider this step. I am admittedly not one of those folks whose hair is multiple shades of gray, nor am I the kind whose hair is a yellowish-grayish mix. But I am not sure this would stop me. Because in my heart of hearts suppose. we can all look our best by (mainly) being who we are.
Through the years, my hair has gotten shorter, and shorter and shorter. I once had shoulder length or longer hair, and I've continually moved to having shorter each time. I'm now at the point of three week haircuts. Part of this is convenience-year around I shower and get out and simply fluff or brush my hair. Part of this is somewhere along the line a few years ago I realized I simply cannot stand to have hair covering my glasses sides so in addition to short hair I have that area around my ears trimmed. By having short hair, I'm ending up coloring it every three weeks as well-and each time using less than half of a store bought container of hair color. So coloring my hair is wasteful, albeit not horribly expensive (nine dollars every three weeks) as well as a pain and time consuming.
But mainly I just think, "Hey, I'm sixty five, and why am I still doing this?". I mean, if my husband were still living, people would most like think his gray hair made him handsome, or at least distinguished. What is it about women that we have this need, on occasion, to hide every vestige of natural age progression? I like to think I look younger than sixty five, but hey, it's not like I look fifty!
This is not about not caring about appearance. As I've said before, while I may not dress like some fashion blogger pals, I enjoy looking good. I have a certain style that is recognizable and my own. I'm obsessive about skin care and the like (I'm one of those folks for whom something less than Lancome night cream simply does not do the job). I work to keep myself healthy and exercise within my personal limitations.
So It's not like by letting my hair go gray again, I'm letting myself "go". I already naturally wear either fairly soft or bright colors (never will you see true red, black, purple or the like anywhere close to me). I wear soft blusher almost all the time because while that 1/64th of native blood running through my veins means my skin never turns pasty white, it also means that no matter how excited or hot I get, my cheeks don't naturally "blush). So even on sweats days, I may have on blusher and chapstick (along with that perfume and those earrings).
Life in retirement (at least for me) is being about who I am, and enjoying life in every sense. While I have not taken that final step back to natural hair as of yet, I'm pretty sure it's coming. And sooner rather than later. Because for me, that's who I am. And with hair as short as mine, it's not like I'll have growing out roots for six months-if you know what I mean!
What about you, ladies (and guys too). If you're not natural, have you ever thought about it? And if your hair hasn't starting turning yet, what will you do when that time comes?
No color for me. I’m happy with my hair as it gradually is turning white/silver/gray. I don’t want to put harsh chemicals on me or into the environment or create more garbage. YMMV.
ReplyDeleteYes, that's certainly an issue. Honestly, I think the hair color gives my hair more body, but this every three week thing is a bit much.
DeleteColored it for years while I worked and then in my 50's I quit. Now 75 and it's multi-colored gray with some white along my temples and I'm happy with it.
ReplyDeleteThe last time I colored it itw as because my daughter thought I should, but my husband didnt care and my son doesnt car, and besides darn it, this is me, lol.
DeleteGoing grey gracefully and so pleased I made the decision to let nature take its course. I have regular cuts and keep my hair in good condition.
ReplyDeleteGoing grey gracefully and so pleased I made the decision to let nature take its course. I have regular cuts and keep my hair in good condition.
ReplyDeleteGood to hear Penny, thanks!
DeleteI started going gray in my 30s, and started coloring my hair at the same time. I stopped 11 years ago though. The first reason was my colorist kept telling me to stop. He said he was happy to take my money every 5-6 weeks (which was a lot), but I and a bunch of other women were putting his kids through college when we would look just as attractive if we let our hair go naturally gray. Hmmm - food for thought. Second reason was seeing the pictures of myself at our son's wedding - my hair was a lovely blond, but it made me look OLD, like an older woman trying to look young coloring her hair. So, I asked my husband and young children what they thought about their wife/mother having gray hair, and they all said "go for it" - we don't care. It has taken me years to get used to seeing it gray though, but I'm happy with it now, and like that I don't have to deal with keeping it colored. My hair is light gray around my face, but a very dark gray in back, and the only thing I've though of doing recently is going silver all over, but the kids and my husband say "NO." So no it is, and I'll save my money for other things.
ReplyDeleteBTW, the biggest issue I've had with my hair being gray is keeping some color around my face. I dress in neutral colors for the most part, but when I first went gray I switched my wardrobe over to black, white, cream and gray exclusively for around a year, and then slowly added colors back in to see what worked and what I liked. I wore red glass frames for years, and after trying another look am going back to red - it's just the pop of color I need to keep me from looking washed out.
Laura, in my reading I did read suggestions about color. I already dont wear neutral colors except for the very occasional gray sweater and large colorful earrings but I expect that I will need to make some adjustments.
DeleteI am turning 62 next month and have never dyed my hair. I did have highlights added once, but salons are very expensive. I am not completely grey, just a few greyish streaks, but I can't see me using dye. It just is not me.
ReplyDeleteGood for you Barbara! I'm in the process of going grey-naturel for the reasons you described. (Though I may try a green or blue streak sometime. Who knows?)
ReplyDeleteAt 57, I am who I am.
I have never colored my hair and it is about 75% gray now than I am 68. That being said it started turning gray when I was 21 so it has taken a long time and I'm glad I let it be natural. I have had to soften the colors I wear as I left the darker brown years behind but that is it. I say go for it!
ReplyDeleteMy natural color in my youth was dark, almost black but I grayed early and have been coloring it for about 35 years. I did briefly let it go natural about 10 years ago. I couldn't believe how snowy white it was. No dark strands at all. Because I have very fair skin I looked completely washed out. It would startle me when I passed a mirror. And I looked 10 years older. Even brighter colors didn't help, but I didn't try colorful glasses frames. If my hair had had just a little color I would have liked it better. I tried lowlighting but that was expensive and didn't always look good. But I am 77 now and considering giving it another try. I am not sure why I am considering it because I know I like it better colored. I suppose at some point my face will be too old for it and I wonder if that is now. Does that make sense? Even though I have the good fortune to look a lot younger than 77. I have gone a bit lighter with the color (sort of chestnut brown). It was a real pain to grow out. Yours is lighter so may not be as difficult and short hair makes the process quicker of course. You have a young looking face and you are not as fair as I am, so it will probably look good on you. And you can always recolor it if you hate it. I may join you in going au naturel.
ReplyDeleteI haven't really coloured my hair for that long so 'no' I am not considering going gray. At least not yet. Perhaps in 5-10 years.
ReplyDeleteGood for you, we all have to do what works for us.
DeleteMy hair is snow white, but I color it and will until I cannot. I have native American, too. My face did fade! I never have a natural blush either. When I have a fever, I do have a good blush, but never any other time. I refuse to wear makeup so I do not look like a white and blank face. I mostly wear red, bright pink, white, and black. Those colors look best on me and always have.
ReplyDeletePeople are congratulating like you, so it seems like a shame for the rest of us to color, like we are doing something wrong.
My hair feels thicker and looks thicker with color. I wish there were something short of hairspray to make it look thicker and shinier without color.
My hair has gone from long, like down to breasts when it would hang over my shoulders to front to now being about three inches longer than shoulders. I went from a layered look of the last twenty years to all one length. My bangs have been with me since I was ten, and they will stay with me to the end.
Hi Linda, I know I have gotten some encouragement here, but I really think that there is no right or wrong way with your hair and I do personallh know many friends who will not stop coloring.. we all have to do what is right for us.
DeleteI meant to add-and I am stilln ot sure I'm taking this step immediately if I do so. But coloring my hair every three weeks is taking it's toll.
DeleteI colored my hair blond for years. I always really liked it then suddenly I started to notice it just wasn't flattering anymore. Everyone else said they still liked it but I felt it made me actually look older. I took on a part time retail job and met so many women. I realized once your in your 60s you don't look younger with colored hair. Most of the time it looks harsh and damaged. The key is hairstyle not the color. So I've gone natural and surprisely people still think it's colored! Here I was coloring hair that was prettier in its natural state. I'm noticing so many women are going natural. Grey is the new blond!
ReplyDeleteI've been white since 34. I color my hair except for the white around my face. I am now in that space trying to figure out if I really want to let go and dive into complete gray hair. It's a bit scary but I can't be 80 with brown hair for pete's sake. Go for it - I hope to follow
ReplyDeleteyou could, if you don't mind doing it, ir paying some one to do it, I have friend in Dallas who still dyes her hair at almost eighty, lord love her.
DeleteI have thin, fine hair that is naturally snow white now. I have been coloring it for years with highlighting and now lowlighting. I make an appointment with the hairdresser every 5-6 weeks. It is part of my "therapy". I do agree that a good cut is imperative. My hairdresser of 35+ yrs has just retired and so I had to find a new salon. What used to take 1.25 hrs as a rule now takes 2.5hrs to complete. My stylist and I are getting to know each other and it's a work in progress. I have taken reprieves from coloring now and again. I notice that when I don't color my hair, I am asked more often if I qualify for the seniors' discount and I'm often addressed as "ma'am". Coloring is not as big an issue for me as thinning. I wonder what I will do when I am bald?! I have a friend who says - I am not grey; I'm chromed!
ReplyDeleteMy hair is very thin and has little body of it's own which is one of the reasons (the other two mentioned above) that I am darned close to a buzz cut these days. I expect that I ma get those questions occasionally with white hair as well, but hey, I'm 65. And while I don't want to look "old", I am sixty five, not fifty!.
DeleteHi Barbara, I will be 70 in January and have always had dark brown, almost black hair (thanks to my parents wonderful genes). I tried dyeing it twice in my 40's, not to cover gray, but more out of curiosity about what a slightly different colour would look like. I was turned off by the mess and the chemical smell of the product. My hair fell out when I had chemo five years ago, but grew back in almost as dark as ever. There is gray now around my temples but it all seems to look right for my skin tones, and I have never felt it made me look older. For me, the best ways to look smart is to update cut, rather than colour. Right now, I have an asymmetrical cut, quite short on one side, longer on the other, age-appropriate, but fun. I am thinking about a colorful streak for my birthday though! Betty
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ReplyDeleteI enjoying your post. You definitely have some great insight and great stories.
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